A web with a log or a log online; Various strangeness is found in mine. Perhaps an account of the things that I do, Or stories of feats too absurd to be true. Imagined fantasies from a mind that's just odd; Discussions about our good, loving God. If you thirst for weirdness, this shall be a quencher-- Welcome to my random adventure.

Thursday, August 10, 2006

The Adventures of Leumas: NoCombust

"It's like...like I can't do anything anymore, without this happening, endangering me and people around me."
-Lou S. Cannon

"I'll be just going about my business, and then suddenly, boom, it happens. I don't know what to do anymore..."
-D. Struction

Do you suffer from spontaneous combustion? Three people burned to the ground this week; two seriously. Doctors estimate that today, one out of every 562,712,981 people suffer from spontaneous combustion. You are not alone; there is hope for you. Try NoCombust, the one drug more or less guaranteed to stop you from exploding.

"Now, thanks to NoCombust, I don't randomly explode anymore."
-Lou S. Cannon

"Thanks, NoComubst. You changed my life."
-X. Plosion

To order your first prescription of NoCombust for only $19.99, just call 1-800-DONT-ASPLODE. That number again is 1-800-923-406-7285. NoCombust is not for everyone; people with retinas should not take this medicine. Side effects may include deja vu, itchiness, swelling, foot odor, premature baldness, bankruptcy, insanity, chronic depression, double vision, triple vision, uncontrollable belching, identity theft, misfortune, ticklishness, blindness, deafness, spontaneous growth of extra limbs, amnesia, bubonic plague, or death. Talk to your doctor before taking NoCombust.

This has been a public service announcement from the Adventures of Leumas.


Saturday, August 05, 2006

Testimony

Ok, I'm gonna try another spiritual post, because as I'm writing this, no one has commented on my last one. This will just be a place to put your testimony--how you came to salvation, what God has been doing in your life lately, or anything of that sort. I'll tell mine, and anyone who wants to can tell theirs in reply. Ok, here we go:

I was raised in a Christian home, which is always good. When I was like four, I prayed to receive Jesus into my heart. Of course, when you're that young, you pretty much believe everything your parents tell you without thinking about what it really means for you. So technically, I was a Christian, but it didn't have a huge impact on my life. Though I was encouraged to live up to the name I had taken on myself, I found that it wasn't always the most fun; I was often bored during Sunday school, and even though I enjoyed reading, I often procrastinated on reading the most important book of all, the Bible, and would go weeks or months without opening it. For a while, I was what some would call a "carnal" Christian.

As my childhood progressed, my life seemed to get worse. Between fourth and sixth grades, I found that other students took great joy in insulting, belittling, and otherwise being unkind to those students who weren't the most popular, of whom I was one. I had few good friends and began to be sad and angry at everything. I doubted that God really cared for me. In seventh grade, things changed, though not necessarily for the best. I did join up with a group of friends who I began sitting with at lunch, and while I enjoyed the company, the fact that I did not have a strong footing in my faith left me susceptible to temptation. These friends were a bad influence on me, and while I must take responsibility for my own actions, they led me to thoughts of sinful things that I otherwise may not have come across, and the thoughts led to choices that quickly formed into habits. During this year, I was further from God than I have probably ever been before, and my foolish choices had led me deeply into a life of sin.

In the summer between my seventh and eighth grade years, things began looking up, though I didn't see it at first. Due to a new job opporotunity on my father's part, my family moved from Bristol, Virginia, my home for the past eleven years, to Lynchburg, Virginia (or technically, Campbell County), where I still am now. Initially I hated the idea of moving; my entire life (save for the first two years which I didn't recollect) had been spent in Bristol, and all my 'friends' were there too. But Lynchburg turned out to be an unimaginable blessing. Our first few months there were spent in search of the right church, and in late September 2003 we came across one called Calvary Chapel. This church was different than ones I had been to before; I noticed that my fellow youth group members actually seemed to be close friends with each other, and within our first few visits to the church I realized that they placed a large emphasis on one's personal relationship with God. I came to the truth that my own spiritual life had been severely damaged, and after some prayer and striving to get right with God again, I vowed to leave my old ways behind forever.

Needless to say, I didn't totally leave my old ways behind. Though I would certainly like to, my flesh is weak, and the sinful lifestyle I had previously built still had a strong presence in my life. But God is merciful, and He gives me victory over sin; with Him, I am enjoying freedom from my past and new life in Jesus. I have made many true friends at my new church, and the past three years of my life have been progressively better, more than I could have conceived before moving. Though I wasn't seeking Him, God blessed my life far beyond what I deserved, and I know that He can do the same for you, too.